


50 Shades of Grey-Skinned Trolls

by PlaceHolderWhoopWhoop



Series: 50 Shades of Grey-Skinned Trolls [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-03
Updated: 2013-01-03
Packaged: 2017-11-23 13:29:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/622690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlaceHolderWhoopWhoop/pseuds/PlaceHolderWhoopWhoop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>50 trolls. 50 sexy times. 50 erotic adventures in Alternia. Karkat, Terezi, Gamzee, Nepeta, Tavros, Equius, Howard the Duck, and more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Rain is Set Fire

**Author's Note:**

> Beware.

ffffffdffffffffffff

Chapter 1: In Which Rain is Set Fire

  
“He’s into Kismessitude,” Nepeta purred at Karkat. They were referring to the all-too attractive troll across the lawn ring. Karkat had never met him, but his name according to Ms. Leijon was Sollux Captor. His long, slender legs were just a hint as to what treasures lie within his pants, and his 3D glasses were nifty as well. He didn’t seem to notice the two of them ogling his audacious body, as he was staring off into the distance at something... or someone... else.   
Whoever or whatever it was, Karkat was glad that he was looking that way, because he was pretty shy and didn’t want to get embarrassed by this handsome man noticing his pervy glances. Despite this, he would have done anything to get inside Sollux, at least from a distance. He wasn’t even sure if he was a nice guy... or a naughty guy. But he would find out.  
Karkat continued to ogle at the delicious hunk of troll from afar and began to work a sizable sweat in his pulsating bone bulge. Nepeta noticed Karkat mopping up the veritable swamp that had appeared in his groin and was aroused beyond belief at the very thought of Karkat’s privates. She wanted, no, she NEEDED to get inside of him.  
“Hey Karkat,” Nepeta purred. “Wanna have a good time?”  
“WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN.”  
“Let’s do like the kangaroos do and fuck a lot.”  
And so they did. Right out there on the street, Karkat ripped Nepeta’s leg off and started beating her in the head with all of his blind fury.  
“Do it mooooore!” Nepeta shrieked, hot with passion like a cat in heat. Much like said cat, Nepeta took out her lighter and set fire to rain. Rain being Karkat’s pants. Their romance was exemplified by this fire, which burned with a flame unlike no other, scorching the shipyards of love, and Karkat’s bone bulge.  
“CONKSUNK ME NEPETA, DO IT NOW.”  
Nepeta knew what had to be done, and did it. She put her cat mouth (like this :3) up to Karkat’s pants and began loving all over the firey wand that was Karkat’s bone bulge. The flames did not bother her as much as her missing leg, but what mattered most to her was fulfilling the passion between them.  
“FASTER,” Karkat yelled as he continued beating Nepeta in the head with her leg. How was he going to get off like this? It seemed like she wasn’t even trying, though the flames may have cut off his nerves. That happened to them sometimes, and it was pretty awkward. In those instances, he usually just punched Nepeta until she blacked out as not to shame himself for being unable to keep his swampy erection going.   
Sollux, being the raging sex fiend that he is in all of my fan fics, couldn’t resist the hot deluge of flaming rain, said rain being hot alien yaois. Sollux ran to the flaming pile of grey fucking and heaved his hot bod upon the unsuspecting trolls.  
“OH YES. FUCK ME HARDER CAPTOR.” Screamed Karkat, igniting the repressed sexual feelings of Sollux into a flurry of hot alien butt pounding.   
And pound butts Sollux did;  there was not a single troll ass for miles that Sollux didn’t ravage with his squid-like reproductive organ (it being common knowledge that trolls have cephalopods for dicks...hot, yaoi cephalopods). Though Sollux was very much fulfilled in the respect of ass bangings, he still felt a certain emptiness. The thing that he was staring at was so far away now, and yet it was so close. (He has depth perception problems)  
While Sollux was distracted, Karkat backed into his pantless frontside and began back-humping the poor troll’s exhausted bone bulge. He was too pervy to realize that Sollux had fucked too many trolls in this short period of time, and he fell over dead.   
Before his death’s finale, Karkat asked him the penultimate question: “WHAT WERE YOU STARING AT BACK LIKE 15 PARAGRAPHS AGO.”  
“I was...*cough*....staring... at.... Aradia. She’s over there dancing around the street naked, and I was... watching... *bleh dead*” Karkat cried.   
“Hey Karkitty!” Nepeta purred. She was being left out of this beautiful scene of public love, and she needed someone to lift her up anyway seeing as she only had one leg. She already cauterized her wound after she stuck her leg stump into Karkat’s flaming cephalopod, so at least she wouldn’t die from blood loss. Remember, be safe and sane and consensual!

They began making out. Their tongues were like a Katamari ball of insanity and twisted nature; each second they were united was one more thimble added to the collection. Soon, Elebits would be used as a metaphor, as Karkat’s Wii Remote stream grew more and more powerful as it recovered from those sicknasty burns that he received previously.

“HURRY LET’S GO GET ARADIA SO WE CAN HAVE BETTER SEX.” Karkat suddenly shouted. With all of the strength he could muster, he picked up Sollux’s body,  as well as  Nepeta, and launched them at the naked Troll, who was still dancing on the street corner. Nepeta’s pants, on account of her missing leg, flew off while she was in orbit towards her unclothed target, and I am not sure if trolls are supposed to have undergarmets, though I assume those would fly off too. Right?

Sollux’s body completely missed and went through a window.

Aradia and Nepeta locked eyes as they realized that they were about to impact each other, if you know what I mean. It was a moment like no other, and the Ram and Cat trolls knew they were destined to meet one another. Nepeta collided into Aradia and they both fell to the ground, somehow coincidentally ending up perfectly in the “scissor” position that was common in lesbian sexual intercouse practices during this time period.

Fun Facts: This is a Safe For Work fan fiction, so we will forgo all details about what happens between these two trolls, so instead we will give you some very important facts and statistics:

 

  * Benedict Arnold was a highly decorated officer in the American Army before betraying his country to Great Britain in the Revolutionary War.
  * Atlanta, Georgia has an LGBT concentration of 12.8% of the city’s population, according to the 2000 census.
  * Titanic was the highest-grossing film of all time until Avatar overtook it in early 2010, 13 years after the movie’s release. Interestingly enough, both movies were directed by James Cameron.
  * Calliope, like the Cherub character from the popular videogame “Homestuck”, is pronounced “Cal-Lee-Oh-Pee”, and not “Cal-Lee-Ohp”, as many may think.
  * Remember, be safe and sane and consensual!



  
After several hours, the two were tired of their lesbian experimentation, and beckoned Karkat, whose Wii Remote stream had regrown to full strength, to come and join them. It was always more fun when there was a guy involved, Aradia thought. Though she did enjoy her time with Nepeta, she liked a big strong Adam’s Apple to suck on more often than the suckle cinnamon flavor of a troll woman’s boobies. If only the two could be combined, it would be more succulent than Apple Jacks on a cold winter morning, the frost melted off your face as you experience the warmth of such wonderfully crafted, scent-free joy. 

Kanaya came pretty close to this lofty ideal of man-meets woman, but she was too annoying. Her quirk, while nonexistant in dialogue form, plagued the very fiber of Aradia’s being. The only times that her thoughts towards the jade-blood were ridded of the irksome capitalizations that she so loved were when they were eating each other out.

Fefairy was pretty good in bed too, but her peppiness was just a shroud. Her real character had much more depth than anyone could possibly realize, as the toils of being a fish princess and the many fish puns that came with the responsibility had taken quite the toll on her; back when she and Aradia were going steady, they had actually discussed the prospects of a sex change operation. It wasn’t serious though; it was more evident that Fefairy needed to blow some major steam, which they did many a time.

Her alternate universe mother Meenah was too rough for Aradia’s standards, but when she and Aranea were both together, it made for an excellent combination. Speaking of that, she hadn’t hooked up with Vriska in years; she wondered how her old kismesis was doing.

Terezi? Aradia had never really met Terezi, though they had been acquaintances for sweeps. Maybe one day they would get to know each other better, and because, let’s face it- Aradia was such a hardcore lesbian- probably end up fucking all the time. Anyway, who cared about girls, anyway? Guys like that cute Karkat were much more fun...... right....?

Karkat was still standing over on the other side of the street. He had been watching Nepeta and Aradia do the fucky thing for like 4 hours, and it was kind of creepy. Maybe he was waiting for an Official Invitation of Sexiness?

“Karkat, get over here!” Aradia screamed, Scorpion nodding in respect. Though she was able to drag Karkat over, he was tepid, not only because of loss of blood.  
“NO, I’M TOO SHY.” Karkat answered.   
“Aww, c’mon!” Nepeta repurrlied.  
“THE NUMBER YOU ARE DIALING IS NOT AVAILABLE. PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE, AFTER THE BEEP.”  
Several moments passed. The three stared at each other blankly.  
“BEEP.” 


	2. In Which Peanuts are Ground into Butter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yes.

****Chapter 2: In Which Peanuts Are Ground Into Butter**   
  
**

Tavros sat on Vriska’s face, his pulsating bulge pressed hard against her face.

 ****“Mruhmmmmph mrh mrh mruhhhhm!” Vriska screamed, struggling to forms words, her face immobilized by Tavros’s cock.  
“Yeah, uhm, you probably like that, don’t you.....uhm.....bitch?”  Tavros whispered softly into Vriska’s ear very sexily and stuff.  
The two grey skinning alien teens where furiously sexing, their bone bulges flying through the air with the speed and grace of a space fencer’s lightsaber. With all 6 of their senses being stimulated by hot space yaois, the trolls almost didn’t notice the body of another troll fly through their window, his hot space loins swollen from gratuitous amounts of space fucking.  
“We should, uhm, fuck this body.” Tavros spaked.  
“Sure, that sounds like a great idea!” Marty sayed as he hopped on Sollux’s weiner sexily.  
Tavros and Vriska ran over to Sollux’s lifeless corpse, the two of them flaying his space face with their space weiners of whatever I don’t fucking know. With such wonderful sex and stuff engulfing the two lively aliens and the one corpse, it seemed as if they were the only three trolls making hot space sex in the world, though they obviously weren’t.  
Tavros and Vriska grabbed the off white sticks and shook them furiously. They incessantly yanked them back and forth, up and down, at a blinding speed. After several minutes of tireless stick shaking, the trolls layed down their Wiimotes and were done playing the baggage carrying “mini-game”, Vriska winning her first “festival” in their impromptu game of My Trolls Party.   
“Wow, that was super fun! We don’t have these kind of games in space 1985!” Marty sayed, stupified by the technological marvel that was My Trolls.  
The two trolls promptly returned to fucking the corpse when Freida Mallak, a tall, slender troll with long black hair with red tips. She was wearing a black shirt with black combat boots with black socks and a black skirt with black fingerless gloves. She was super sexy and stuff.   
“Lets have sex.” Freida sayed sexily as she took off her black shirt and her black boots and her black skirt and her black socks, leaving only her black fingerless gloves. She looked super hot.  
Then the three sexy trolls sacrificed Troll Marty McFly to the gods of the underworld as an offering to revive the recently deadened Sollux. After that everyone had sex on top of Marty’s corpse and that is the end of the chapter or whatever fuck you.


	3. In Which a Baby is Born

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John/Dave sexiness.

**Chapter 3: In Which A Baby is Born**  
  
Troll John looked longingly into Troll Dave’s eyes.  
“What’s up?”  
“Nothing much.”  
“You look a little.... OH MY GOSH WHY ARE YOU WRITHING ON THE FLOOR TROLL DAVE”  
“It’s not because... I’m... pregnant or anything...”  
“Troll Dave are you pregnant?”  
“No...”  
“Really?”  
“No, Troll John. I lied. I AM pragnent!”“WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?”  
“I’m sorry you had to find out this way.”  
“Who’s the dad?”  
“There are some things you can’t know, Troll John.”  
“Ok. But who is the baby?”  
“The baby... The baby, Troll John.... is you.”  
  
TO BE CONTINUED


	4. In Which There is a Musical Number

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's like Broadwaystuck I guess. Or not. Whatever, I don't care. Fuck you.

Chapter 4: In Which There is a Musical Number

Equius, Howard Theduc, and Tedude 344Fiv stood over one another. What would become of this very sexy encounter, the third of these being the most sexy by far? Transformers, six of them, dropped down on the scene and began to have a dance party. This sparked the genius Tedude to realize something.  
“We should have a musical number in this chapter, guys!” Everyone who heard him agreed, though Equius and Howard were already fucking too hard to hear him so they just ignored him and kept doing the dangley thing (more details on this in Chapter 8!)  
They all began to sing.  
(Set to the tune of “Jingle Bells”, by Erik Scheele.)  
FUFUFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUUCK,  
FUFUFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUCK,  
FUFUFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK,  
FUUUUUUCK,

(Chorus)  
FUCK FUCK FUCK,  
FUCK FUCK FUCK,   
FUCK FUCK FUCK,   
FUCK FUUUUUUUCK,  
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUFUFUCK FUCK FUCK,  
FUFUFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK,  
FUUUUUCK,  
(repeat a lot until you have the desired mate)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: Erik Scheele did not actually write Jingle Bells. He did, however, make One Year Older, the awesome album on http://homestuck.bandcamp.com/album/one-year-older


	5. In Which Christmas is Celebrated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's so... sad :'(

Chapter 5: In Which Christmas is Celebrated  
“Mommy, why is daddy not going to be home for gri..I mean Christmas?” Sweet, darling Fefairy asked her mother Mrsbon Awsmtn, the sexxiests of all goblins.  
“You see, many years ago, in the dark times before the Great Purge, your father was a crazed sex fiend.” Marsbn Awrsmn explained. “He would travel the lands in search for the choicest of space-ass, which as you can probably guessed, eventually led to you. He didn’t know his limits though, and plowed so many hot loins that he died. It was a tragic day for all, an a dark shadow fell across the land as the golden child had passed on. I still miss him to this day.” A single tear sexily ran down her space face.  
“It’s ok ma, don’t be such a square!” Fefairy exclaimed “I’m sure that dad will return one day, and plow your choice loins once more!”  
“I sure hope so” Marbas Munawh said softly “I sure hope...”  
Just then a slender, ghostly figure figure resembling the kid from Zombies Ate My Neighbor stormed into the hive.  
“I have come!” the figure said “I have come for your loins!”  
“So it begins” Fefairy and Mwubyr Awemon said in unison.  
What happened next is far too graphic for this Safe For Work fanfuck, but it involves taquitos, formaldehyde, band-aids, and a boot. Now, instead of gratuitous amounts of smut, I give you some beautiful poetry.

Upon the Threshold of Consequence  
A one pink wallets  
Yeah whatever pink wallet  
Poem about wall

Everyone had a bunch of sex and died but are now zombies now because I want them to be zombies. Also Sollux is now a vampire. The End.


	6. Chapter 6: In Which Tinker Toys are Played With

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I didn't actually write anything for this chapter. The plot summary was gonna be, Vriska and Terezi have sex time, and Terezi pokes Vriska's eye out while they're using sex toys. Terezi eats the eyeball and then sticks her troll virginia in her eye. Don't Do Drugs.

Chapter 6: In Which Tinker Toys are Played With  
\---------------------------  
The end.


	7. Chapter 7: In Which Consequences Are Instant

Chapter 7: In Which Consequences Are Instant

Darles Rrussi was a troll with darker than black blood and dark sinister insidious evil wretched vile abominable crazy stupid tofu plans. Looking upon the streets of Troll Houston, he saw three of trolls, one of them using a leg to beat the other two while they had sex. He also saw, through a window, the greatest necrophiliac acts he had ever witnessed, at least since after his dad died, along with some seriously cool tinker toys. He saw some idiot singing a song while two others did very weird things that will be detailed next chapter, and he saw the joys of Christmas. But most of all, he saw two of the universe’s greatest threats on the street. This is what he saw, exactly:

TROLL DAVE: JOHN, I’M HAVIN A BABY   
TROLL JOHN: I know!  
TROLL DAVE: We need to go to Mount Prospit, so that I can have this baby in peace!  
TROLL JOHN: There’s no time! We have to hurry and birth him quickly!  
TROLL DAVE: I wanna have mah baby!

Troll Dave’s water was breaking, and his imaginary Troll Virginia was just ready for Baby Troll John to come out. He laid down on the street, and Troll John watched the miracle of life beginning anew. Troll Dave’s penis-hole began widening, getting larger and larger until it could fit the head of a new baby. A grub slowly slid out, and with it came several ounces of the finest shade of gray blood that he had ever seen. Troll Dave had the purest, most canonical grey blood in all of existence, and it made him a most desirable mate.   
Finally, the lust of the power of the moment overcame Troll John. This was an ectobiology lab, and there were experimentations to be made, people to be loved, and people to be given love. Troll John pushed his baby self aside as he inserted his penis into Troll Dave’s imaginary Troll Virginia and began doing the sex in the most pure, troll missionary-type way possible.   
TROLL DAVE: Oh boy, this is gonna be a good one.  
Troll John bursted his liquidy nectar into the uterus of his best friend, and instantly, a new baby was being created. Both of them could watch it now.  
TROLL JOHN: It’s so beautiful.  
TROLL DAVE: So... What’s for dinner?  
They both laughed.

They were going to eat Baby Troll John.


	8. In Which Wrestling is Popular

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Howard Theduc does make this a crossover, I know, but.... It's still Homestucky. Ok?

Chapter 8: In Which Wrestling is Popular

“Oh, Equius!”  
“Oh Equius!”  
May consolations were made to Equius by one Howard Theduc, who was very sorry about his little... “accident” over the weekend. For you see, back in Chapter 4, they had homosexual relations for quite a while, but it ended very suddenly.   
*FLASHBACK*  
“Oh Howard!”  
“Oh Howard!”  
Howard was buttfucking his buddy Equius while their sexy pal Tedude 344Fiv was creating the greatest song of all time. He was saying some stuff, but neither of them could hear because their passionate embrace of penis and asshole were too loud.   
Equius, being the strong lad he was, felt this act as a soothing massage, not realizing that it would be the last that he would ever experience. Many a troll had pleasured him in the past, but only Howard was adequate enough to make Equius feel anything other than... intense complacency. Eridan and Gamzee, even together, were nothing but raw meat. Which is what they became after Equius smashed them up. Trolls do make good lunch meat, Equius knew that.  
As luck would have had it, a lone housefly, buzzing its wings around the universe that we call wherever the hell they were at, (probably the same street that everyone else is in) landed on the bare bottom of the steed-loving mister. Tickling his rumpus, he was forced to flex his gluteus maximus on an impulse of the nerves; something that could not have been otherwise prevented. The results were dire.  
For you see, Howard’s bone bulge almost instantly snapped off; blood went everywhere, and there was much screaming to be had by both parties involved. And now Equius had a pointy object stuck in his behind, unable to be dislodged! Now how would he be able to fulfill his sexual fantasies? His feminine side came out and he began to whimper like a little girl, something so horrendous that it was known as the Vast Pout. This lead up to the many apologies that we had previously been shown, as given by Howard himself, who now lacked a penis.  
“Well,” Equius, attempting to stop his tears, began. “there is ONE thing you could do for me...”  
“What’s that?”  
Equius had to whisper it in Howard’s ear, being the embarrassed little girl he was (and the em-BARE-ASSED man he actually was).   
“WHAT?” Howard shouted suddenly. Apparently he did not like what he heard, and Equius began shying away.  
“No I mean, what, I couldn’t hear you. I have a hearing disorder.”   
Equius knew what had to be done. He took all the breath he could muster, picked up the naked and castrated Howard, and tossed him into the air while he gave the Vast Shout, a wail so terrifying that it pierced the heavens like a drill, and could slice meteors in half, though only when it was directly over Troll Houston.   
“SUCK MAH DICK”  
Howard, completely immobilized by this command, began satiating his thirst for the sperm of this bug alien creature guy, and summoned the entirety of his saliva caches to soak the appendage with. But then he accidentally bit down, and chomped Equius’s dangley thing off too! Oh no!  
“Oops!” Howard was very shocked about his accidental bite.  
“Hahahaha!” They both laughed.   
“Now that we both lack dicks, I know what we can do,” said Equius. He had always wanted to simulate the female act of “Scissoring”, which was extensively covered in Chapter 1. He knew it was very much akin to wrestling, and that was his favorite sport. John Cena and Sting were his favorites But he was a male and could not perform any acts of tribadism naturally. But now that both of them had lost their penises..... They knew what to do.  
“Let’s do this.”  
And so it was.

(Here is an audio supplement to help you out with imagining this!)  
https://dl.dropbox.com/u/30874504/musics/rthwrrttrtghbrtf.wav


	9. In Which Two selves meet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> last one, finally.

Chapter 9: In Which Two Selves Meet

****

karkatyells had been really angry lately! Nothing was going right in his life, it seemed. Just a bunch of circumstances provided by the fate of life, seemingly designed by Hussie himself to torment the poor troll and enrage him. Why did bananas exist? Who were the Blues Brothers? What was a yolo, anyway? karkatyells knew, however, that he would only live once, and that he needed to make the most of his life.

He spotted something odd in the distance, this fine day. It was humid, but the warmth emitting from the green sun was not too harsh that it would completely fry his brain. That is what he wondered, though! If his brain wasn’t fried, then why did he see himself in a very public display of indecency out on the streets of Troll Houston?!

“Hey Fuckat!” karkatyells expleted. That was usually what he said when he met a clone or copy of himself. This Karkat paid no heed to his JPEG-impressioned alternate universe brother, as he was in the middle of a very ingracious sex act involving several buckets, a leg, and two female trolls that karkatyells was unfamiliar with.

Oh yeah, well if karkatyells wasn’t good enough for THIS Karkat, then he’d show him up in the only way he knew how-

“FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK”

karkatyells stormed off.

Nepeta turned and looked back, seeing the compressed karkatyells behind her. She was disconcerted for but a moment before she turned back and continued their threesome, with her favorite activity; getting fingered with her own foot.

Karkat and Aradia were becoming fast friends as well. Though they had sex, and pretty good sex if Karkat was the judge (and he was, as he was always the judge of tentacle bonding activities) the romantic side of their relationship did not express itself, and they realized that they were better off as fuck buddies. Besides, even though she kept telling him that she swung mainly for guys, he wasn’t sure about that at all. Now they were taking turns fingering Nepeta with her foot while telling some funny stories about Troll College.

“YEAH, I HAD SOME CRAZY DAYS BACK IN TROLL COLLEGE. THAT’S WHERE I MET NEPETA.”

“Oh yeah. Crazy’s one word to describe it.”

“I CAN BARELY BELIEVE I PASSED ANY OF MY CLASSES.”

“True that. I remember when I had to take my finals for Titanometry, during the middle of the test, some girl started eating me out. While I was taking my test! I’m glad the teacher didn’t see, or she might have joined in! That would have been awkward.”

 ** ******Karkat and Nepeta looked at each other.  
“...”  
Nepeta, finally done with her feet-excursions, began looking at Karkat longingly. “Honey, remember our wedding day? Those Bulbears were so nice.”  


Upon saying this, she and he started making out. Both of their shirts were still on, despite the hours that both of them had been fucking in the middle of public. That would soon change. Nepeta put one hand around Karkat’s magic stick, and the other on the back of his shirt. She gently caressed them both, and then suddenly, violently, jerked them both off. It was pretty sexy, until Aradia accidentally farted really loudly.

“Oops!”

“IT’S OKAY.”

Undaunted, they continued. Karkat began his round of the game, and went for a bold move, using both his hands to take off her shirt at the same time! But what was underneath was... preplexing.

“WHAT THE FREAKING FUCK IS THAT.”

Both he and Aradia were confused by an odd contraption where Nepeta’s breasts were.

“It’s called a bra,” Nepeta explained. Neither of them understood at all. What purpose did it serve?

“WHAT PURPOSE DOES IT SERVE.”

“Why, it helps you fuck better!” She never explained her claim, but she wasn’t able to; Kakat began beating her to a pulp with her leg.

“WELL GUESS WHAT.” Karkat seemed inexplicably angry.

“....What...?” Nepeta gasped for breath, nearly unconcious.

“I’M INTO KISMESSITUDE.”

****

The End.

 

**Author's Note:**

> There are 8 more chapters. Have fun.


End file.
